Sunday, June 28, 2015

Father's Day 2015

I stayed home to feed the baby while the family left for Sunday school.  While feeding her I decided to get caught up on some bills and in doing so, realized our health insurance had been canceled by a misunderstanding with the Maryland Exchange.  I was paralyzed with shock and numbly gathered baby and headed to church.  As I pulled into the parking lot dread settled over me like a smothering blanket.  I felt like I couldn’t breathe.  My dad died 11 years ago so I kept thinking why bother even going inside, I don’t have a dad.  This service is just going to be about dads and everyone will be super happy and I’ll get even more depressed.  But a small voice said just go, you’re already here.  Just go inside.

The service ended up being the most healing and precious time I’ve ever spent inside a church.  Someone, I don’t know who, had arranged to play a recording of a song that my dad was well known for singing.  I was stunned to hear his voice.  His song was “Jesus is more than enough”.  More than enough to handle my insurance debacle?  More than enough to handle my anxiety over my trip to Florida?  To cover me while driving in Florida on the crazy busy 95 highway with 6 lanes when I’ve gotten used to 2 lanes? 

I left church feeling comforted and my anxiety lifted to where I felt like I could breathe again. 
 

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