Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Random Tuesday: Bedtime script - I think we are ready for own reality show


INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT


Two parents, struggling to get three children to sleep.  One sits in the corner rocker with a quiet one year old while the other alternates cuddles with the older siblings.

SAM
PBBBBRT! (noise)

MOM
No Sam, stop that.

SAM   
PBBBBBBBBRT! (noise)

MOM
Saaaaam!

SAM
Moooom!

MOM  
One more Poot and I’m leaving.

SAM
GIGGLES, Moooomm, GIGGLES

15 seconds of silence, parents hold their breath in the hopes that it will all be over soon.

SAM
PBBBBRT! (noise)

MOM
Stop it!

SAM   
Stop it!  GIGGLES

MOM
You’re such a two year old

DAD
Sam, no, that’s not nice.

SAM   
TOOT.  He he.  GIGGLE

MOM  
Stop it!

Sam:   
Stop it.

MOM
You little parrot.

SAM
Ma, your a pirate.

CHARLOTTE
No, her’s a princess.

Sam:    No a pirate, ya ya ya ya ya

DAD
SHHHHHHHHH

SAM
ABCDEFGGGGG, HIG, LMNOPPPP, QRS, TUV, WXYN, ZZZZ (singing)

CHARLOTTE
12345678910111213 (singing)

MOM
That’s enough, no more singing!

SAM
Baa Baa (singing)

MOM
SAM!  No more singing!

SAM
Nooooooo!

MOM
Close your eyes.

SAM
Mom.

Mom
Quiet!

CHARLOTTE
(quietly) I wish I could talk to ghosts.

MOM
Um, why?

CHARLOTTE
Because I like it when I talk to friendly ghosts.

MOM
Have you ever met a ghost?

CHARLOTTE
Um, no.  Maybe I can be a ghost for Halloween!

MOM
Yeah, maybe you could be Princess Ghost with a crown!  Or a bear in a squid costume!

CHARLOTTE
Yeah!  Or maybe I could be a Squid!

MOM
(hurriedly singing) Night, night, sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite, wear your socks and shoes, sweet dreams to you, and I love you.  And you, and you and you!

CHARLOTTE
I don’t want to ever hear that song again mama. 

Lights dim and while dad continues to rock one year old, mom makes a quick escape.  And so ends another typical night.

Stacy

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