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Saturday, December 18, 2010

My Perfect Baby

Words cannot describe how grateful and ecstatic I am with my perfect baby boy. He is so relaxed and calm. In the morning he's patient while we tend to his sister first - or she throws a major fit (but I'm thinking of switching this because she's getting way too demanding and shouldn't expect to be first always). He happily eats and is then complaisant to sit in his bouncer while we buzz around getting breakfast, taking the dog out and getting ready for work. While observing our morning ritual he falls back into dreamland with a nap that takes anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes. He is a dream baby.

His sister was the exact opposite - we couldn't put her down without risk of screaming bloody murder. Maybe 5 minutes at best to grab a quick breakfast, she MIGHT last slightly longer while one scarfed down the food - she was a very time-consuming child to say the least. I wrote to no avail with requests for information as to when it's okay to let a screaming child stay in her crib when there is clearly nothing wrong and all I got was information stating that in their first year they need to learn that mommy and daddy are going to meet their needs and so they shouldn't be left alone to "cry it out" or it would lead to a lifetime of problems. So we walked her and walked her and showed her the world from arms perch. At night she took an ENTIRE HOUR to put to sleep. Rocking, walking, rocking, walking, we'd take turns.

Sam frequently falls asleep in his bouncer or playpen. Even when held he falls asleep very quickly and then only needs held for 15-20 minutes and never ever wakes up screaming the second he hits the crib. He is a dream baby.

Sam plays! He loves to play with toys in his playpen, crib, bouncer or hanging from his car seat. Charlotte didn't play with toys until almost 1.5! I was convinced all baby toys were a complete sham! She just didn't care about anything but being in our arms, up high and seeing the world. She's an adventurous, high spirited little girl and I wouldn't trade her for the world but even so I am so so so glad my son is chill.


unmitigated me said...

Please consider that you are probably more easy-going this time, too, and babies KNOW! WHy don't you let her become part of taking care of little brother's needs before hers sometimes? And they are never too young to learn about taking turns. I was so lucky with two pretty relaxed kids, and two grandmas who loved to walk a fussy baby!

unmitigated me said...

And, really, those people are right that they need to know mommy and daddy will meet their needs, but it also doesn't have to be immediately! Best advice I ever got...letting the baby cry while you finish your last few bites never hurt anyone.

I am SO ready to be a grandma! Can you tell?

crazywildberry said...

I had a relaxed baby boy, a more spirited baby girl and another somewhat relaxed baby girl. I was ecstatic with our first and loved holding him, but at 6 months old he was already 24 pounds and I couldn't hold him all the time. He was a good baby and slept and ate very well. Second baby was an alert little thing from the minute she was born. I made a decision somewhere in there that I couldn't always rush to my kids. I had two at this time and I am a stay-at-home mom who nurses till the babies are 12 months old. I can't always drop everything. And I believe that someone eating should be allowed to eat in peace too. Me or the babies. So, I sat and they had to wait. I did my best to be sure that everyone was content and happy, but I needed some peace too. So, sometimes the baby or the toddler had to sooth themselves. Then, baby number three came along. She is more easy-going, but not as much as her older brother. She cried a lot in her babyhood. I was one and they are three and sometimes, sometimes, it just couldn't be helped. I tried, but I was tired, and they seemed so demanding. I was so happy when this period of our life was over. Her babyhood was gone or some of it anyhow, but it was a hard time. I now see that letting her cry gave her the skills to self-sooth and self-entertain herself. And I am glad for that. My baby #3 is pretty independent.

Also, some babies cry for no reason. My sister had one of those. She would put her crying baby in her crib and walk out. Let her baby cry for 10-15 minutes while my sister regained some sanity. Her baby was going to cry either way, so why hold her and let all the crying drive her crazy. She held her baby a lot otherwise. And for those 10-15 minutes, she got some time to shower/rest/grab a cup of tea.

I would say, too, that at almost 30 months old, Charlotte needs to know that she is loved, but so is her brother. I would also encourage you to let her help with his care. And, if she takes temper tantrums, I would stick her in her room for two minutes to cool down. I do that with my 2-year old too. Works. It may take some time to work out, but you will see some progress if you stick to your guns.

Blessings, Rachel. :) (Sorry... you know how talkative I am.)