Today there was extreme parental abuse. Anytime a parent is sick and a child proceeds to pull every shady move in the book - it's parental abuse.
I have a cold that brought me home by 3:30pm yesterday whereupon I went straight to bed. Thursday was lovely because husband took care of me along with shuttling the most difficult little ones to bed and I got to finish the evening with a nice hot bath and meds.
Today was different - cold set in more extreme and husband had to leave for work by 2pm. It all started with Charlotte refusing to take a nap. See - I NEED her to nap so I can nap. I got Sam to nap by 2:10pm and for the next hour sat dutifully next to Charlotte while she kicked the couch, scratched the couch, flailed, etc. Lest you remind me that she might be done with naps, she still does them for her father every day! I even tried his tactic of holding her in my lap and she still flailed like a maniac. Finally I just sat at the end of the couch and read a book so she popped up to read with me. But before one chapter was over she was poking at my book and forcing me to lose my place so I packed up and took her into the master bedroom, locking the door behind me. So tired, I actually fell asleep on the bed while she played around me. Sam woke and whimpered, I prayed he'd go back to sleep, he must have because I dozed off until Charlotte demanded release from the room. It was almost 4, she had to use the potty - lies! She went straight into Sam's room and woke him up. Sigh. It was almost time to get him up anyway.
We all sat down for snacks, she asked for chocolate bread and then didn't want it. She got down from her chair and stole a cookie from Sam's tray. I gave it back and she removed all her clothes in protest while I was on the phone with my mother so I had to watch naked child crawl into the cupboards - in and out. Very strange sight indeed. After phone call I redressed her but a short while later it all came off again with panties being dipped into the cats water bowl - honestly?!?
I do still have onsies that fit, slapped one on her. Little while later a shrill scream was heard from the restroom when she realized the top was impossible to remove and she had to use the potty. Much laughter from parental unit.
By 6pm I was counting down the minutes until bedtime and decided to take both to the store to just get coffee. Sure, why not go out and get one item if it keeps both kids occupied (tied down into car seats) for a short period of time! Never mind that it's drizzling outside and Charlotte will demand an umbrella and then walk painfully slowly through the parking lot while I hold the tip of her umbrella and beg cars to look first before backing up. Sam settles happily into the sling - surprisingly I can still get his 20+ pound butt in there for short trips where both hands are needed.
Whole Foods provides mini carts for children and Charlotte is well versed in shopping there so we head straight for the little carts for our single purchase of coffee. Might as well! We careen through the store hitting no one and check out with 2 bananas added to the mix.
Back at the van, Charlotte stands and stares into the van while Sam and I get rained on. Stuck on options, I lift her by her pants and drop her inside, closing the door behind. You'd have thought I got a leg stuck in the door with the ensuing howls that followed. Heavy sigh, I buckle Sam in, get wetter, come back and buckle Charlotte in. On the way home she screams NO DANCE to the radio so we drive home in silence.
At home I decide to give both children a bath to ease them into the bedtime routine. Charlotte BITES Sam on the butt making him scream thus ending his bath.
Baths finished, I move onto bottle for Sam and rocking him to sleep. During this Charlotte comes in and sweetly lays her head on my arm. Suspicious I look around waiting for something to break. She leaves. I finish with Sam. Ask what she wants for dinner, eggs. Work up some scrambled eggs with cheese and we eat together. She's sad, misses daddy - me too!!! She finishes, brushes her teeth, goes potty and I rock her for a bit. She then goes to bed without a single crying fit. I'm so shocked - almost every night involves a knock down battle. Sigh. I'm going to bed.