I didn't put socks on my daughter today!
- late for church and rushing down the long corridor and stopped with the following exchange:
women "awww, what a cute baby"
women "but her feet must be so cold! You should put some socks on her"
me "her feet are fine"
I rush past her.
- in Barnes and Noble getting coffee and magazines when accosted by another concerned women with the following exchange:
woman "awww, what a cute baby"
women looks at baby and coos in baby talk voice, "are your little feet cold", looks at me, you should put socks on her!"
me - silence
women bumbles on "I love it when they are that age, so small and cute, do you stay home with her, or work?" as she cocks her head
me - "my husband stay's home with her"
women's eyes bulge in surprise "really, so I guess that makes you the bread earner"
me - "I guess so"
women - "so what do you do?"
me - "I work for a toy company"
women tries to process this very complicated situation and nods knowingly "so you must make good money doing that"
me with desperate look of horror babbles "it's fun and my husband works on the weekends and while I stay home with baby"
woman - looks relieved that husband is not a deadbeat, breaths a huge sigh of relief and says "oh well that's okay"
me - big pause, searching for an exit line "okay well you have a nice day now"
- Whole Foods, stop at prepared foods counter
me - "do you have Italiano Chicken Breast?"
women - "no, not until tomorrow, awww what a cute baby, but you really need to wrap her up, it's cold outside!"
me - "she's fine"
Folks - I live in South Florida, it's 75F/24C outside and inside every building it's the same temperature it is every day. Sun's out and every time I get in my car I turn the air conditioner on. I must have a sign on my forehead that says "It's my birthday, tell me how to dress my child!"